The Content Jedi Blog

Oh, hello, and welcome to Part 2 of Stop Using These Words and Phrases.

In my last blog post, I implored you to scrub these clichés from your vernacular : “No Pun Intended”, “Put Things In Perspective”, “They’re Selling Like Hotcakes”,  “I Can’t Complain”, “Live Each Day Like It’s Your Last”, and “Make Your Dreams A Reality.”

They’re used so much that they’ve lost their meaning, plus it’s annoying to hear them. All I want is for folks to be better communicators, and with that, I present more terms that need to go by the wayside.

I DON’T HAVE THE BANDWIDTH

What are you, a human modem? A flesh and blood ethernet connection? Living, breathing megabytes per second?

Away with the office speak!  If you’re too swamped to do something, just say so. Practice in the mirror: “Mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the busiest of them all? Me!”

If your plate is too full or you don’t have capacity…crap, I’m using clichés to decry clichés.

Never mind.

THANKS IN ADVANCE

🚨PRESUMPTUOUS ALERT 🚨

Don’t you love it when someone makes a request in an email and concludes the message with “Thanks in advance”?

Sort of defeats the purpose of an ask, doesn’t it?

I know its origin story. Presumption and Passive Aggression met, had a one-night stand, and conceived and gave birth to Thanks In Advance.

Just be direct and say something like, “I’d really appreciate it if you could get this done.”

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT  

We continue our descent into the language inferno with this one.

“With all due respect” is “Not to be rude, but…” Lite. It’s the failed attempt to qualify and excuse yourself for saying something offensive.

Examples include:

• With all due respect, your baby is ugly.
• With all due respect, you suck at life.
• With all due respect, your chicken tastes like rubber.

But the Crème de la Crème is this gem from Cameron in Ferris Bueller's Day Off:


I DON’T MEAN TO BE POLITICAL, BUT…

“I don’t mean to be political, but…” is the “With all due respect” of not trying to sound political.

Here’s the thing: everything is political because politicians write the laws that govern every aspect of the way we live.

• Owning or renting a home is political because of real estate laws.
• Shopping on Amazon is political because of consumer laws. 
• Going to the doctor is political because of health care laws. 

You don’t have to preface your thoughts and feelings with, “I don’t mean to be political, but…”, because based on what you say, your audience will know instantly where you stand politically.

HONORABLE MENTION

The Oxford English Dictionary added man cave to our lexicon to piss us off.

If being a man means having a pool table, Xbox, flatscreen TV, and a wet bar in a basement room that perpetually smells like fart, then we need to redefine masculinity.

EXCEPTIONS

Hard Stop

This term is overused, but it’s so effective. Meetings go over their scheduled time often, but if you start by saying, “I have a hard stop at 10,” people honor that. This way, you can end on time and head down to your man cave to play some Grand Theft Auto.

ASAP

These capitalized, meaty letters mean business. Use them selectively, though. You can expect results when it’s work related, but don’t count on it to light a fire under your children. When I tell my son to clean his bathroom ASAP, his only reaction is to immerse himself further into Roblox.


Okay, rant over. I will write to you again soon.

About the Author, David Telisman






I am a Writer and Content Creator, and I work with businesses to inspire their customers to buy from them. I believe that my clients deserve to feel proud of how their content marketing looks and what it says, and I deliver by providing expert content writing and email marketing solutions.

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